“Just imagine a number of men in chains, and all condemned to die, some of whom each day have their throats cut before the eyes of others. Those who remain see their own condition in that of their fellows and, observing one another with grief and without hope, await their turn. That is the image of the human condition.” — Blaise Pascal (died 1662)
[In honor of our Kickstarter campaign for The Fridge of the Damned…(remember: the chance to pledge and receive great rewards ends Feb 1st!)]
The Fridge Peep Show
Freezer Friday by Charlie Layton
Abandoned Appliances Flickr Group
Fridge Monster by Daywalt Fear Factory
The Undying Horror of the Refrigerator
You already know 2012 was pretty weird. Here’s a small sampler of annual roundups that reaffirm it…
Here’s a goofy Saturday morning cartoon about “Narwhals” to get your spirits up for New Years. Sure, it’s more PG than my usual choices, but its creator, Mr Weebl references Lovecraftian Horror and that deserves respect. Chances are good you’ve already seen it — it only has about 30 million views on youtube. The song will stick in your head. In fact, it just might impale itself there.
You should check out the beautiful National Geographic photogallery of Hunting Narwhals to see the real things.
That’s just a hint at their creative genius. Dice Productions has this thing about small things in big places and vice versa. You should also take a gander at their award-winning, touchingly gross full-length feature, All Consuming-Love (Man in a Cat).
Maybe you wouldn’t call this a cartoon, but I don’t care, because you need to see this. The Cat with Hands (2001) is an awesome short film by award-winning British filmmaker Robert Morgan, mixing live action and animated wax in a very uncanny and disturbing way. Film Threat magazine called it “mandatory viewing for anyone who wants to write a horror movie. Not because of what Robert Morgan does, but because of what he doesn’t do.” True. But I’d say what he does accomplish in this film is also just as brilliant.
Phlegm rhymes with gem, stem, and them…words that sound normal enough. In fact, it wouldn’t be such a disgusting word if it weren’t for that perfectly placed letter “g” — that most mucousy of consonants that we can only sound out by constricting the back of our throats. Yet it’s also the one letter in the word we do not pronounce — as if we DARE not pronounce it. For if we ever did, green sputum would gurgle from between our lips like something vile burping up from a sewer drain.
It is a perfect word. Perfectly disgusting. It’s very utterance sounds like we’re sneezing from our stomachs. Its very look on the page is akin to a mucous membrane, viscous and slimy with its dribbly ‘p’ and it’s globular ‘g’ dangling down from the line. Compared to its simple sister, “snot,” or its boring brother, “nasal discharge,” phlegm is some pretty potent pus. But it is also none of these things; phlegm refers specifically to respiratory sputum — it is a lung loogie, pure and simple. While it can be a symptom of any number of bronchial diseases, it is most commonly produced by smoke inhalation or excessive screaming, and therefore everywhere apparent at heavy metal concerts and gas chambers and taxicabs.
Expecting? Expectorating? You know Phlegm would make a good baby name. It’s just…apropos. Especially fun if the baby’s last name is Onyachin, or when you label his sippy cup.
Still in your jammies and slurping cereal in front of the tube? Then click through to this week’s Saturday Morning Cartoon…
“The Mysterious Stranger” was a scene in the 1985 film The Adventures of Mark Twain, in which Tom, Huck, and Becky get a visit from a very familiar character…who teaches his lesson through an apocalyptic nightmare.
Good morning. Let’s turn on the time machine and watch an original nightmare cartoon from last century’s Depression-era cultural dreamscape: “Bimbo’s Initiation” (1931). This classic animation from the great Max Fleischer is a surrealist haunted house story as much as it is a edgy, pre-Hays Code, Betty Boop classic.
If you like this kind of thing, you’ll also dig Fleischer’s “Swing You Sinners,” which transpires in an uncanny graveyard. Both films are detailed in Cracked.com’s article, “5 Old Children’s Cartoons Way Darker than Most Horror Movies.”