Attention writers of short-short horror stories: Ligonier Valley Writersis hosting a new contest looking for flash fiction on “Werewolves and Shapeshifters”. Deadline is Aug 15th. I have agreed to be the finalist judge.
Nope: this adjective has absolutely nothing to do with Barry Gibb, though it may be associated with a “night fever” of another kind, since the term is often used to describe the moon. A “gibbous moon” is what you call it when the lunar disc is more than halfway illuminated, but not yet full. It is the “pregnant moon” — the one that frustrates werewolves and geeky lunar eclipse aficionados everywhere.
“Gibbous” also more generally describes an oddly convex shape, a lumpy bulge…anything grotesquely tumescent or otherwise odd-shaped and resembling the head of Stewie Griffin from Family Guy. Gibbous comes from the Latin word “gibbus” which literally means “hump” and the term has been employed to malign hunchbacks by foppish aesthetes everywhere since the 18th century. I hereby propose we deem Wednesday of the work week “Gibbous Day” (instead of the colloquial “Hump Day,” which always sounds nastier than it ever is).
Of course, in “first person shooter” games, any splort of blood or flesh blown off a person’s face is called a “gib”…but this term likely comes from “giblet,” not “gibbous,” as any chicken farmer who has read his HP Lovecraft certainly would know.
+ Slime never feels slimy to slime.
+ Bark all you like, the man in the moon has no ears.
+ Biting off the head silences the victim. But it is the feet that will stop them from running away.
+ Beware of things that go bump in the day.
+ Man, like monster, also has sharp teeth.
+ Those who most shun garlic, often most enjoyed it in their youth.
+ The sleep of madness brings forth humanity.
+ Wear gold jewelry. When silver is in fashion, wear even more of it.
+ Like a stake through the heart, so is the love of the clergy.
+ A man eating plant will even swallow a vegetarian, when hungry.
+ A garbled threat is but a spell cast by an illiterate witch.
+ An infant vampire bites hardest.
+ Even werewolves shave during the day.
+ It is not your tentacles, but the acid that drips from them, that frightens your prey.
+ Those who fear the sun too soon often awaken before sundown.
+ One can catch a good human with a bad hamburger.
+ Holy water stings but a neck bite is forever.
+ Nothing is more stupid than an exposed brain.
+ Fortune favors the cleaver.