goreletter:imaginary_trivia
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+ | THE GORELETTER: | ||
+ | Arnzen' | ||
+ | |||
+ | http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | +++ Vol. 3.04, Sept 27, 2005 +++ | ||
+ | |||
+ | **Imaginary Trivia** | ||
+ | |||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====BLATHER==== | ||
+ | Blather. Wince. Repeat. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Imaginary Trivia | ||
+ | |||
+ | A boy was born with six breasts in 1962. Only two of them survived. | ||
+ | |||
+ | If one searches long enough in Salem, Massachusetts, | ||
+ | |||
+ | The first slide observed by the inventor of the microscope was smeared with his own nasal discharge. An enigmatic notation in the margin of his lab report reads: "God is cold." | ||
+ | |||
+ | Weeks before the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, another plane beside the Enola Gay carried the atomic bomb to Asian shores -- but this early flight was lost in the Bermuda Triangle. Neither the B-29 bomber nor its payload have ever been discovered. One military legend suggests that they were actually sent on a supernatural mission to destroy whatever force was behind the triangle itself. Another has it that the plane was swept up into a hurricane that still swirls untracked in the Atlantic, waiting to strike American shores. | ||
+ | |||
+ | It's a little known fact that in 1883, the first iron gynecological instrument was used to torture a man. | ||
+ | |||
+ | " | ||
+ | |||
+ | On the eve of his execution in 1974, Gary Bronson Davis gleefully requested "Human Head Cheese and Whore Haggis" | ||
+ | |||
+ | The first flyswatter was actually a cat, swung by its tail to smash a pesky housefly. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Secret Vatican scrolls reveal that the first human baby was named neither Cain nor Able, but Cainable. He was actually a conjoined twin, before one side ate the other during a violent argument (hence the term, " | ||
+ | |||
+ | Few realize that the invention of the handkerchief predates men's underwear. | ||
+ | |||
+ | After his beheading at the climax of the French revolution, Louis Bastarte' | ||
+ | |||
+ | Enormous marbles were swallowed by ancient Romans in order to cleanse the bowel. Games involving the stones soon followed. Today we call it Bocce. | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====UPCOMING APPEARANCES==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | Want a book signed? Want to attend a fiction reading or take a horror writing workshop? I'll be at several events throughout October and I invite you to drop by. I always enjoy meeting subscribers at these things. | ||
+ | |||
+ | October 7th, 7pm\\ | ||
+ | Barnes & Noble | Monroeville Mall, Monroeville, | ||
+ | Play Dead Book Signing | ||
+ | |||
+ | October 8th, 7pm\\ | ||
+ | DV8 Espresso Bar & Gallery | 208 South Pennsylvania Ave, Greensburg, PA\\ | ||
+ | Poetry/ | ||
+ | |||
+ | October 22nd\\ | ||
+ | Ligonier Valley Writers | Scottdale, PA\\ | ||
+ | Horror and Fantasy Writing Workshop\\ | ||
+ | < | ||
+ | |||
+ | October 27th, 7pm\\ | ||
+ | Barnes & Noble | Monroeville Mall, Monroeville, | ||
+ | Guest Visit with Short Story Book Group | ||
+ | |||
+ | October 29th, 7pm\\ | ||
+ | Barnes & Noble | Greensburg, PA\\ | ||
+ | Reading and Play Dead Book Signing\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | November 3rd-6th\\ | ||
+ | World Fantasy Convention 2005 | Madison, WI\\ | ||
+ | http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | Keep your eyes on the Goreletter weblog for updates: < | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====ONLINE GIZMO OF THE MONTH==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | " | ||
+ | |||
+ | Sure, you'll spot a lot of familiar horror images and feel like you've been here before. But there' | ||
+ | |||
+ | Play Exmortis: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | Brought to you by Ben Leffler Web Design: < | ||
+ | Need help? The Exmortis walkthrough can assist, as a last resort: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====INSTIGATION: | ||
+ | |||
+ | It's twisted memoir time! | ||
+ | |||
+ | + Dramatize your own funeral (and/or wake) from the viewpoint of the person in attendance most likely to be bored by it all. | ||
+ | |||
+ | + Look deep inside and mull over your greatest fear. Now write about what you think caused you to be so scared of this silly little thing. Consider everything out there that's even scarier. | ||
+ | |||
+ | + Write about being tortured in hell for your own greatest sin. Go on. You deserve it. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Instigation is a WEEKLY department in Hellnotes newsletter...who also now publishes a new online magazine based on selected prompts called Wee Small Hours! | ||
+ | |||
+ | Hellnotes: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====GORELETS: | ||
+ | |||
+ | Figure With Meat | ||
+ | |||
+ | "one has to remember as a painter\\ | ||
+ | that there is great beauty in the color of meat." \\ | ||
+ | -- Francis Bacon\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | these heavy wings\\ | ||
+ | of hand carved carcass\\ | ||
+ | flutter with the ghost throes\\ | ||
+ | of rusty meathook panic\\ | ||
+ | pulling me out of my chair\\ | ||
+ | with all the audacity\\ | ||
+ | of a drunken butcher\\ | ||
+ | lifting me high\\ | ||
+ | as a crucifixion post\\ | ||
+ | and my dinner fork\\ | ||
+ | clatters on the table\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | [ Inspiration: | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====ARNZEN NEWS==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | + PLAY DEAD: A ROYAL FLUSH!\\ | ||
+ | My novel, Play Dead -- hot of the press -- has been getting a great response from readers and reviewers alike. An excellent write-up has just appeared in Ransom Notes, the Barnes and Noble newsletter for mystery readers: "If Play Dead were a poker hand, it would undoubtedly be a royal flush." | ||
+ | |||
+ | The special "Grim Grimoire" | ||
+ | |||
+ | Play Dead: < | ||
+ | |||
+ | Order at Amazon.com: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | + IN DELIRIUM\\ | ||
+ | The anthology -- In Delirium -- which includes my previously unpublished story about a mad dentist who creates his own toothy monster called "Mr. Mouth" -- just went up for sale at Delirium Books and rumor has it that it's already almost sold out! It's a cool limited edition, due to mail this Christmas, and aside from being full of extreme horror tales, the collection is unified by one principle: the stories were all free gifts donated to the publisher, Shane Ryan Staley, by people he's published in the past...simply as a gift for being one of the best publishers of horror around. The quality of Delirium hardcovers is among the best in the business. And with a line-up that includes hot writers Brian Keene, Kurt Newton, Mark McLaughlin, Tom Piccirilli, Weston Ochse and more, I can see why this rare collectible is almost sold out already. Get it while you still can at Delirium Books. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Delirium Books: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | + POE'S LIGHTHOUSE\\ | ||
+ | Edgar Allan Poe once began an intriguingly weird short story called "The Lighthouse" | ||
+ | |||
+ | I'm honored to have worked with the master' | ||
+ | |||
+ | Cemetery Dance: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | The original fragment: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | + DREAMS AND NIGHTMARES FOR TWENTY YEARS\\ | ||
+ | The 72nd issue of Dream and Nightmares poetry magazine just arrived in my mailbox. I'm not only a contributor to this issue, but a lifetime subscriber to the magazine, and they' | ||
+ | |||
+ | + HORROR FICTION: AN INTRODUCTION\\ | ||
+ | UK scholar Gina Wisker has put together a great overview of the horror genre for Continuum Books recently, called Horror Fiction: An Introduction. I was impressed by the range of topics covered by this book (...and surprised to find myself listed between King and Hitchcock in the chapter called "The Best and Best Known" in the genre, along with a discussion of my book, 100 Jolts). Wisker does a great job covering the primary elements and nuances of the genre, so if you're looking for some good scholarship on horror, this is a great place to start. Find it at: http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====WEIRD SITES OF THE MONTH==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | Board Games for the Demented | ||
+ | |||
+ | World' | ||
+ | < | ||
+ | |||
+ | Googly Chess by Bob Crouch\\ | ||
+ | < | ||
+ | |||
+ | Totally Gross Board Game\\ | ||
+ | http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | BONUS FUN, KIDS!\\ | ||
+ | Gross Out Games for Christian Youth Camp | ||
+ | http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====NOT DEAD YET: PRINT REVIEWS==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | Strange Itineraries by Tim Powers lives up to its title: it's a trip. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Tim Powers is a powerhouse fantasy novelist. He's probably known best for his historical fantasy, and books like The Anubis Gates and Declare have won him a huge following. I think my favorite is Last Call, a book about the inspiration behind playing cards come to life, which was one of the handful of card-related stories I read as I was working on my novel, Play Dead. It taught me more about writing than it did about cards, per se. An accomplished writer of what you might call " | ||
+ | |||
+ | Tim Powers a " | ||
+ | |||
+ | Strange Itineraries collects nine fantastic tales by Powers, culled from anthologies (like the mega-horror book, 999), collectible chapbooks, and familiar serials like The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction and Asimov' | ||
+ | |||
+ | In his introduction, | ||
+ | |||
+ | Strange Itineraries is available in trade paperback for $15.95 (US) from Tachyon Publications. | ||
+ | http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | (And congratulations to Tachyon who is celebrating their tenth anniversary in publishing!) | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====OUR ODD TRIPLE FEATURE==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | Dead Like Me | ||
+ | |||
+ | For your next movie night, rent:\\ | ||
+ | The Seventh Seal (1957)\\ | ||
+ | Love and Death (1975)\\ | ||
+ | Meet Joe Black (1998)\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====PLAY DEAD REVIEW RACE: ANOTHER CONTEST!==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | Be among the first Goreletter subscribers to post a customer review -- pro or con -- of my new book, Play Dead, at amazon.com, barnesandnoble.com, | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====HAIKRUEL CONTEST RESULTS==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | I received many excellent entries for the Goreletter' | ||
+ | |||
+ | Below are the winning entries. Didn't win? Eager for more? The " | ||
+ | |||
+ | THE WINNERS: | ||
+ | |||
+ | Soft belly babies\\ | ||
+ | Two hearts strong rhythm -- stiff hooks\\ | ||
+ | Both splitting wetly\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | -- Stephen M. Wilson | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | blind casket petfood\\ | ||
+ | mouse balloons and memory\\ | ||
+ | cat embalmed in milk\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | -- Cameron Pierce | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | Squalid brain balloons,\\ | ||
+ | Memory writhing inside,\\ | ||
+ | Gleam with mad wonder.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | -- Tanya Twombly | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | Embalmed skin costume\\ | ||
+ | Naked writhing locked inside\\ | ||
+ | Wet with casket worms\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | -- HorrorWench | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | HONORABLE MENTIONS | ||
+ | |||
+ | Cat paws out the heart\\ | ||
+ | Of the dead mouse as it spurts\\ | ||
+ | And it tastes like milk.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | -- Barbara Bates | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | Dead memory worm\\ | ||
+ | writhing inside wet brain chunks\\ | ||
+ | with unstoppable rhythm.\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | -- Kathy B. | ||
+ | |||
+ | The contest is over, but you can always post fridge magnet poetry on "The Damned Fridge" | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====BOO COUPONS==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | It actually pays to scroll this far down. | ||
+ | |||
+ | EXCLUSIVE HALLOWEEN OFFER FROM NOVELLO PUBLISHERS\\ | ||
+ | The Right House on the Left is a comedy-horror chapbook featuring hilarious haunted house fiction from three of the funniest writers around: Mark McLaughlin, Steve Vernon, and L.L. Soares. For the month of October only, Goreletter subscribers can get 20% off this outrageous book by ordering directly from Novello Publishers. That's just $4.00 each (and that includes postage)! Make your check or money order payable to "Maria Barracato" | ||
+ | |||
+ | THE SHOCKLINES SPECIAL\\ | ||
+ | My favorite bookstore, shocklines.com, | ||
+ | |||
+ | THE RAW DOG IS STILL SCREAMING\\ | ||
+ | This great bargain is extended for Goreletter subscribers only. Buy any book directly from the publisher' | ||
+ | < | ||
+ | |||
+ | GET FICTIONWISE\\ | ||
+ | Fictionwise.com -- the web's best sci-fi and horror e-book seller -- maintains a special 15% off page for Goreletter subscribers, | ||
+ | |||
+ | DISCOUNT ON DARKNESS\\ | ||
+ | Dark Discoveries magazine is offering an exclusive discount to all Goreletter subscribers. Save 25% on subscriptions or single copies. That's 4 issues for $14.99 or single issues for $4.50 instead of $5.99 (shipping is free!). You can pay thru paypal (to: jjbeach@spiritone.com ) or see the publisher' | ||
+ | http:// | ||
+ | |||
+ | HELLNOTES OFFER\\ | ||
+ | Writers: Don't forget that you can get a free 2-month "Taste of HELLNOTES" | ||
+ | < | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====COLOPHON==== | ||
+ | All material in The Goreletter is © 2005 Michael A. Arnzen, unless otherwise noted. All rights reserved. Permission is granted to forward the entire contents as a whole, without alterations or excisions. Direct links to articles in the archives or the weblog are permitted and encouraged. For reprint permissions of individual pieces, please contact arnzen@gorelets.com. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Winner of the 2003 Bram Stoker Award for Superior Achievement in Alternative Forms from the Horror Writers Association: | ||
+ | |||
+ | Subscribe, unsubscribe, | ||
+ | |||
+ | Read The Goreletter online as a draft-in-progress, | ||
+ | |||
+ | Our surrealist product endorsement: | ||
+ | |||
+ | With apologies to latitude 53,41667, longitude 27,91667. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Help spread the strange. Forward this issue to your weirdest friend! | ||
+ | |||
+ | ====PITHY MORBID THOUGHTS==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | The True Value of Interior Decor | ||
+ | |||
+ | "The consumer' | ||
+ | -- Stanislaw J. Lec (died 1966) | ||
+ | |||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | {{page> |